”Your royal highness, lords, ladies and gentlemen, it gives me great pleasure to be here at the gala opening of the most eagerly anticipated cultural event this century.
I have long had a taste for the exotic, and it simply thrills me to see these pieces where they belong – in the civilised environment of a world class exhibition space. It seems only yesterday that one could travel carefree through Rhodesia, Tanganyika or the Congo, bagging ethnographics and bartering cult figures, but in these dark post-colonial times, one must be satisfied with what one can get. Which my dealer informs me is yet another dashed load of Mesopotamian seals, and a crate of Gandharan stuff from Afghanistan! Oh well, one must only hope the Persian material will be finer. We shall see.
It is simply fantastic to have these marvelous new pieces on display. I do thank enormously the generous lenders, particularly The Collection of a Gentleman and A Very Important Collection, who have given us the opportunity to view these quite sumptuous little artefacts. I am sure we shall all be rewarded.
I must also thank our sponsors, Larceny International, who have taken a keen interest in the arts as part of their corporate responsibility ethos. Larceny have not only led the way in exploitation of dwindling resources, they have actively sought to crush local resistance to their projects, and over the years have built themselves a fine reputation and a superb portfolio of very important antiquities, which no one is allowed to see.
So without further ado, I propose a toast to Queen, country, and culture, and hereby declare The Assemblage open.”
